Jokes: captain

Evasion Tactics

A police officer pulls a guy over for speeding and has the following exchange:Officer: May...

Red Shirt

There's a captain and his crew, and they always won naval battles. One day, a sailor calle...

Screwed, For Sure

Once a lady wanted to leave the U.S.A. but couldn't get a visa. One day, she met a man who...

Aye, Aye, Captain!

There once was a captain of a ship, and everyday at a certain time he would lock himself u...

A Blonde At Sea!

A depressed young blonde was so desperate that she decided to end her life by throwing her...

Barrel Statisfaction

In days of old, this young sailor was about to sign up for a 6-month trip on a sailing shi...

Prayer Wanted

As the storm raged, the captain realized his ship was sinking fast. He called out, "Anyone...

Camoflauge Clothing

There once was pirate captain who, whenever it looked like a battle would be imminent woul...

Spock's Discovery

What did Mr. Spock find in the toilet? The Captain's log!

Riding The Camel

A captain in the foreign legion was transferred to a desert outpost. On his orientation to...

Horny Captain

As the plane began to descend towards the airport, the captain announced "ladies and gentl...

Flight Announcement

A plane was taking off from Kennedy Airport. After it reached a comfortable cruising altit...

Scarry Landing

A plane was taking off from Kennedy Airport. After it reached a comfortable cruising altit...

Captain Hook's Death

How did Captain Hook die? He wiped his bum with the wrong hand!!

Star Trek 'n' Computer Geeks

What if Data Ran Windows98? WORF: Captain, there are three Romulan warships uncloaking dea...

Trekkies Love: Captain Kirk's Ears

Why can Captain Kirk hear so well? Because he has three ears: a left ear, a right ear, and...

Blonde No An Airplane

This guy goes to sit at his plane seat in first class, and finds a blonde there. He says, ...

The Poor Camel

The new Marine Captain was assigned to a recon company in a remote post in the desert. Dur...

Dangerous Light

Through the pitch-black night, the captain sees a light dead ahead on a collision course w...

Suitable Clothes

The lookout aboard a clipper ship spots a pirate ship approaching, and yells down to the c...

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