One liners

Why do farts stink?

Why do farts stink?So deaf people can enjoy them too.

Lawyers

Q: What do lawyers use as birth-control?A: Their personalities.Q: How can you tell when a ...

Blonde's Pain

A blonde touches her knee with her finger and yells Ouch. The same with her elbow and ear....

Man's Heart

???Any woman that thinks the way to a man???s heart is through his stomach is aiming just ...

Blondes and UFOs

Q: What is the difference between a smart blonde and a UFO?A: There have been sightings of...

Talking

A husband was asked: Do you talk to your wife after sex? His answer: Depends, if I can fin...

Psychoanalysis

Q: Why is psychoanalysis quicker for men than for women?A: When it's time to go back to ch...

Knocking

If your dog was barking at the back door and your wife knocking on the front door who woul...

How Did You Know?

A Woman in a store buys milk and bread. Man at counter: ???Bet your???e single???. Woman: ...

Who Listens?

First year of marriage: the man speaks, the woman listens. Second year: the woman speaks, ...

Sexual Excuse

Pupil: ???Is sexual exhaustion can be an excuse for not doing this week???s assignment????...

Best Quality

A wife asked her husband: ???What do you like most in me, my pretty face ormy sexy body???...

Mistakes

Any married man should forget his mistakes, there's no use in two peopleremembering the sa...

A Ring

The girl asked her lover, "Darling, if we get engaged will you give me a ring?""Sure, " re...

Speaking Part

Kid: ???dad, I got a role in the school play, I play a man who???s been married for twenty...

A Dancer

Girl: You would be a good dancer except for two things. Boy: What are the two things? Girl...

Snail

A snail walks into a bar and the bartender kicks him out. A year later the same snail re-e...

A Bra

Wife: ???Give me some money. I want to buy a bra???.Husband: ???Why? You have nothing to p...

Ten Pounds

Wife: ???I just lost ten pounds!???Husband: ???Turn around, I think I found them???.

Lightbulb

How many rednecks, does it take to screw in a lightbulb?Three. One to hold the bulb, and t...

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